the haunted hollow tree

New figurative and some other news

2011-11-26T13:54:00.001-05:00

Hello, hello! I hope my friends have all had a happy thanksgiving!

I have been quite busy lately. A lot has been happening with myself as a person, a mother and an artist. Changes. Life has been a bit more peaceful lately, which is welcome. I have my stressful mommy/artist crazy juggle moments, but it seems to be generally more calm. Starting tomorrow, my husband is now also a work-from-homer, which is exciting and kinda like, huh.... how are we supposed to BOTH work from home in this house that seemed so huge when we moved in four years ago, but now seems like it's shrinking around us. It's a great thing though because he has been home so very little and we miss him so very much. So that is actually the most exciting news that I have to share. More family time, and hopefully a little more stress free time for me to work on my work :)

I have been working more with the three dimensional wood pieces, I know I haven't shared any of those pieces up until this point, so will just throw a few photos out there...

They are so contemporary and so different from my traditional work and I have battled for a little while with myself on how it would be perceived (from who, I don't know) to stray so far from my normal work. I have a always had a love of minimalism and there is something so textural and simplistic and they really captivate me. They work so well into how I decorate my home and I just really enjoy creating these pieces.

All of these years I have struggled with creating really soulful human portraits because of the focus necessary to do so and I have found myself getting over the top frustrated at everything and everyone when I try to work on those pieces and just can't with my two little ones here. These design pieces have filled a space for me, they allow me to be creative and keep busy during the craziest parts of my days, which keeps me from harboring so much on my other work. I have gotten into a nice rythem cycling through about three or four pieces at a time, and working on those pieces when the environment in my home allows for me to. I woodburn during the days when I can get a sitter and have the house to myself, I crack the windows for fresh air, throw on some tunes and woodburn away. At night or really early in the morning, when the kids are sleeping and the house is quiet is when I work on my figuratives, and during the day, when it's just bumping and loud and chaotic is when I work on my design style pieces. The kids hang out with me and the dining room table and they play with the little houses and make tiny villages and we sit around chatting or singing, or playing little games in between. AND the times when it's really crazy, like the kids had too much sugar crazy, or when they are extra fussy and I am lucky enough to have my husband home, I hit the garage and cut, shape and sand the little house pieces. It's seriously like a well oiled machine around here, okay, it isn't really, but it works pretty darn good for me.

This all kinda leads me to another thought that has been creeping up on me. I eat, sleep and breathe my kids and my art. I don't have much downtime, and I have no clue what it feels like to be bored. Art is not something that's forced, it's something that I truly deeply love and I feel frustrated and anxious when I am not involved with a creative project. My sister said to me recently that I am so lucky to have 'this' and have something that I love and am passionate about that is mine alone. One can always find a way to see some greener grass on the other side, cause I think just the opposite. I always think how, at times, it must be so nice to have nothing else. To work at a job that when you walk out the door you don't need to think about again until you walk back in. You go home, you cook, you clean, you read, play with the kids, watch movies... just be. Just be, without this other thing always in the back of your mind. I don't know if it's good or bad, or neither, but I really have this dedication to what I do and I can't do or be without, no matter how hard I try (and there were times that I have tried). I don't even know what it's like to read a book anymore, it's been SO long. I watch movies or tv shows on occasion with my husband at night, but most of the rest of my time is my children and my art, and I am happy. So I guess that's the answer right there.

So it has been awhile since I have completed a figurative, and that has been half because of my new cycle of working only when I can fully focus, and half because I worked on this piece for an obscene amount of hours. Obscene I tell you. It has evolved and changed substantially along the way. I actually took a fair amount of work in progress photos this time and it's something that I find really important and beneficial to do. First, here is the completed piece

And here is a really sloppy collection of the WIP photos.

Look at the green, and then later the red. At least it proves that when it comes to color, I try. lol. It just does something to me, and I always find ways to work it back out. I actually love how the remnants of the red tinted a bit of pink into the final piece though. When I first started taking WIP photos of my pieces, after I finished the piece and looked back I would get seriously bummed out if there were some, or many aspects of the work earlier on that I think were more effective. So then I 'wasted' hours more working on these small little areas only to make them worse off. I actually stopped taking the WIP's specifically because I hated that feeling so much afterwards. Now that I have started taking them again, I still have those difficult feelings, but now I actually look at the photos along the way instead of at the end. And in doing so, and moving forward with the piece, you are faced with the challenge of trying to merge what worked so well in an earlier version and what the piece was, with what the piece should ultimately be in the end. It's a really neat process. I still usually look back and find parts that I think I overworked and morphed into areas that might be a bit less impressive, but it's just part of the process. I still battle that "when is enough, enough" with almost all of my figuratives. After you work and re-work and are 15 hours into a relatively small piece and sorta feel like you are at the point where you aren't even 'seeing' it for what it is anymore and are looking at it so technically that you are missing the overall vibe, that question always comes up for me. And when I don't have an answer for it, I just keep working. Then all of the sudden I just get this feeling that it's done and it's where it should be and I stop. I am not at full peace with this intuition yet and have really been forcing myself to avoid critiquing it any further once I get that feeling. :)

I must go now. I haven't talked in so long here on my blog. I have missed it but have so much to do. I always say that I am busy busy, but lately and over the next couple of weeks I truly will be busy busy busy. I have a feature coming up in a super big magazine and I don't even know how to prepare for that.

Oh and lastly, just want to share another book cover that my work was featured on. It is the piece titled "Sanctuary" and is the cover art for a book titled Kelimeler ve Kader by Esra Yalazan. It is a collection of literary critiques and has been published by Timas publishing house in Turkey. It's funny, I was contacted by them not long after I was contacted for the previous book and I had never been contacted about anything like this before. I thought that I somehow got caught up in some internet scam or something. I am thrilled with both books though, it's pretty neat :)

Exciting news to share!

2011-10-12T16:59:00.000-04:00

My work has been featured as the cover art of the Korean translation edition of Hakubutsu / Le Boudhha Blanc by Japanese writer Tsuji Hitonari. In 1999 Le Boudhha Blanc won the French Literary prize Prix Femina Etranger.

Although I am unable to read the language, the publisher was kind enough to offer these words on the subject of the book “It philosophically reflects life and death, war and peace”. The book is extraordinarily beautiful and I am thrilled to be a part of the newest publication.

I hope all is well with all of my friends here. I hope those whom are artists themselves are forging ahead with their creative journeys! I have been pedaling along myself. I am happy to say that I don't feel quite as overwhelmed so much anymore. Maybe it's because my youngest is leaving the 'baby' stage. Not that the terrible two's have been a walk in the park, but it has somehow changed and is in many ways easier. I have stopped stretching and squeezing and forcing my art time in. I don't think it happened so much as a conscious decision, more just happened on it's own which I am grateful for.

I have been moving ahead with some exciting projects lately. There is actually second book that is currently in print that will feature my work as the cover art too, which is exciting! Been working on some neat pieces in between and just handling the daily business of my Etsy shop.

Time to run and wake up my youngest one. Did I really just let her nap until 5pm?? I did, and I am going to pay. for. it. tonight :) :)

two new pieces to share

2011-08-29T20:34:00.000-04:00

Just wanted to pop in and share two new figurative pieces. I have been so darn busy lately with a few bigger projects but wanted to quickly share these.

The first is a 9x12 portrait on a cradled masonite panel. Casein paint and pencil and this really neat fabric that I absolutely love. I held it up and once I saw it there, I couldn't not use it.

and this piece which I just completed the other day... a smaller 6x8, also a cradled panel masonite panel.

I hope all is well, friends!!

work in progress...

2011-07-27T21:49:00.002-04:00

Here is one more work-in-progress shot (left) and a final shot (right and below) from the figurative I started yesterday morning, worked on through today and completed tonight. There is an earlier photo in my previous post as well. Both of these shots were taken tonight on my easel with a table lamp...which always results in yuck-yuck photos. I will take final pictures tomorrow AM. I am really happy with this piece and really enjoyed my time with it. One thing, and this happens every single time that I take WIP photos... that part of me that wishes I stopped somewhere in between ?? Sure, there are some additional details to the work that result from the additional hours of pouring over the piece, but in looking back, there is a simplicity that is sometimes lost. I also have a tendency to leave my pieces a little unkempt looking as it is, usually when I try to 'finish' them and clean them up a little, I find that I lose some of the interest. I *might* keep working on it. I don't know, it's hard to put into words... and this has been an exceptionally long day. I will just leave my thoughts at that and post a daylight photo of it tomorrow.

I am going to bed happy tonight. I just feel very filled with love from my children, husband, family and my art. Just am happy.

back to painting

2011-07-26T13:44:00.001-04:00

I have been on a woodburning kick and feeling rather ho-hum lately. I have been recently re-inspired to get back to some figurative work so I worked on this one for a few days....

At the start of it, I thought it would be fun to take some WIP photos. Sadly, there is only one photo, and then the end result. Oops. By the time I remembered I was supposed to be taking progress photos I thought I was practically done with the piece, so I didn't bother. Ironically I ended up spending about another 4 or 5 hours on it. This is the one photo, thrilling isn't it?

I am happy with the piece overall. I spent a really long time with the back and forth business in terms of contrast. I had a love/hate relationship with it for about half of the process. A lot of my paint style pieces lately, I usually feel like I know when it's done, or could possibly be done. I didn't ever feel that way with this one, so once I felt like it was mostly balanced, I put it down to wait until the next morning. The next morning came, and I looked at it and felt that it was done. So that's that. It is titled "The Climb".

I am working on a very impulsive little 8x10 portrait now, it's the one in the foreground of this photo.

I worked like speed lightening on this yesterday morning while I had a whopping 15 minutes of free time. When the 15 minutes were up, that is what it looked like.

Going to work on it later tonight after the kids go to bed. And THEN, then I vow to complete the piece in the background. It's on my easel which means it will get worked on. This piece has cropped up on this blog a couple of times already, looking the same each time. I have grown to love it as is, and was half tempted to never touch it again, just, well, because. But it's calling to me... so that is next.

Lately I have been feeling extra invigorated and artistically inspired. Fun!

Lastly, I just wanted to mention that my blog will be remaining here on Blogspot. I made note (then not too long after, deleted the post) that my blog would be moving over to my new Wordpress site, but that will not be happening. I am using Wordpress more as a portfolio and official site for my work. There is a Recent Work scroller at the bottom of the homepage, that is where I will be adding all of my new pieces as they are complete. Here is that site. I will definitely get some of those pieces here too, the ones that I want to talk about at least, but that site will have a more comprehensive view of my work. And also, there is my Facebook page too, which I have been more active with as well.

I also will be starting to hold regular giveaways of my work, and that will take place here on my blog. Little collections of prints and small originals will be up for grabs. Look for that soon. Promise!

That's all for now. Chat later.

-Lauren

new pieces and new friends

2011-06-01T15:51:00.003-04:00

Hey, hey, hey, look at me! It's only been a couple of weeks. ;) So I have a few new pieces to share. I also have a new friend to share as well.

First, a few new Flight series pieces...

Flight. No. 13 (sold)

Flight No. 14

and a work in progress shot

Flight No. 15

And a new piece for the resurrected Found series from 2009.

Found No. 4

So this one is funny how it came about. In 2009 I made four Found pieces. The series was still life based, and the subjects would be little bits of things that have come into my life and struck me in one way or another. The fourth piece was actually completed at the time the others were but I never felt right about it. I kinda got disillusioned with the series once I began to feel like the concept was too personal. So the piece had met the same fate as one too many other completed works that I never felt like putting out there... I put it on a shelf and moved on. And on that shelf it sat cozied up with the others for a couple of years now. I had just finished a few Flight pieces and was looking through my stuff and I saw that panel and realized that I hadn't thought about that series in quite some time and really thought about the meaning behind that concept. I asked myself if I were to do another Found series piece, in it's place, what subject would mean the most, which 'bit' of something would be genuine to the concept. It came to me in a matter of moments and at that point I realized it MUST BE DONE. So I took my completed Found series number four piece right on out to the garage, flicked on my belt sander and away it all went (well most of it). What remains is some distressed looking white casein paint from the original piece.

I could have very easily got rid of it all, but I kinda liked the feeling I got when I thought about traces of it remaining there. I also like that memory of all of the detail that was once there. I see layers in my mind when I look at it. The original piece that I looked back on as meaningless, now serves some type of purpose for me. So that is the story behind that. The reason I selected a feather is, well, lets just say that little white feathers have been cropping up all around, and they are coming from a very special person.

Which transitions me into something that I would love to touch on in more depth sometime soon... how can an artist sell and part with a piece that is laced through and through with personal meaning?

OH and I almost forgot, just something that I have been kinda obsessed with lately. Our new little friend.

I passed a display of these while shopping the other day and I was instantly enthralled. I am not usually an impulse buyer especially for things that do not really serve a purpose, but I couldn't put this little lady down so I just had to take her home with me. When you tap the lid she flutters all around. Sometime she flutters real crazy and makes this neat little clinking sound against the glass, and other times she will rest in a spot and open and close her wings very softly. I have been getting a big kick out of her and am so happy for this particular impulse purchase. I was sitting on the floor with my two kids playing with the jar and I said to them "lets name her!" Let's give her a name that is really dainty and pretty. And my son (whose 4) thinks for a moment oh goes "I got it!!" "Lets name her Stinky Pete". Wellllll, that name isn't at the forefront of my mine when I am thinking of dainty and pretty. And he said it as cute as it could possibly have been said. So there you have it, our new friend Stinky Pete.

And sorry for the weird spacing and font changes that are littered through this post. I had some drama go on while putting it together and I am all out of "quiet time" for today, so it will have to do.

Also, I am going to be posting an art giveaway here on my blog very shortly, so check on back :) :)

the worst blogger in the world

2011-05-16T18:39:00.019-04:00

I swear, another 6 months?? Okay, I am not going to bore you with all of the goings on around the Gray household, but rather a quick update and then on to the art talk. My son is now 4, my daughter 2. I am busy. I like to work on my home (which was a MAJOR fixer upper but starting to get totally cute now) and I like to work in my garden (vegetables/sunflowers/pumpkins, ya know, the yummy healthy foods and then the fun stuff for my kids) so what time does that leave? Not a ton. Trying to work on pretty much any aspect of my art with the kids is like oil and water, not happening. The gardening and home decor, yep, we can make that happen as a family unit. I still fit the art in about every other spare second I can. Always with the kids around of course, so the oil and water thing happens on the daily, but we make it work. So here is the thing, my kids don't sleep. Kids are mammals right, don't all mammals need rest? Not mine. And for those wondering about the screeching that my littlest one has graced me with the past year. It's still there, and yes, it has evolved into a more MA-tore screech, kinda louder and more angry... should little ones like that be so angry? What do you have to be angry about, your two?? BUT she has turned into a total love bun.. when she isn't screeching. I thought my boy was cuddly, she is super extra sweet and kissy and cuddly. Love it! It makes the screeching MUCH more tolerable.

I don't like neglecting my blog, it gives me a major boo-boo face, and I feel it lingering there in the back of my mind reminding me about how I just don't get to it, how I don't devote enough time to certain aspects of my art which ultimately means I don't have as much to say. Not to mention the fact that I have seemingly become a total recluse. I was always my fair share withdrawn from the world, but I could put a smile on my face and fake some enthusiasm. Now I feel like I am too tired to care these days. I think that also contributes to my lack of contribution. Well, no more I say. I have been doing so much fun stuff with both art/craft/home related and I definitely want to start sharing some more of it here. I have also had a lot of great things happen with my art, in particular over these past few months. One biggie that I would LOVE to share, but unfortunately have to keep it zipped for awhile longer. But I do intend on sharing much more about the projects going on around here, if anyone is still around to listen that is. lol. So those are my plans.

Being an artist, of any kind, visual arts, music, etc. is a really interesting thing. Once you let it creep into your life and become a big part of who you are, you can't take it back. It's like a permanent life changing decision that you don't even know you are making, it's like it is slowly made for you over the years. I LOVE art. It pretty much nestles comfortably somewhere between the front of my mind and the back of my mind at all moments of my days, weeks and months. I have grown a lot within myself over these past couple of years, these years where art 'time-outs' have gotten wrestled into my life no matter how unwillingly I let it happen. It reminds you first and foremost that it is obviously important to you, and that it's worth making it work. It reminds you that it's okay to have something else along side of your family be important to you too. It reminds you that it's not about making money, or expressing yourself to whomever, or telling stories. You learn that it's a therapy of sorts and it's okay for it to be that. I get reminded everyday when I am running around like a crazy person trying to do too much at once how important it is to be Lauren, along side of being a Mom. Nourishing something that you love is an absolute necessity, especially when you are a parent. I guess the key is to find a way to make it all happen with the least amount of frustration for all parties involved. So are any of you holding out on me with that secret formula? If you are, GIVE IT UP!

Lastly, let me share some of my art projects from the past 6 months. Unfortunately I have lost a good share of files in the Great Computer Crash of 2011. It was terrible. But I got a brand new shiny iMac out of the deal, so that's always a bonus, right?

So below are some of my newer pieces. These are fun! I got bored of plain wood, and the cradled panels just got ho-hum after awhile, so I started mounting italian poplar ply onto the hoops and then edging them all the way around for a really seamless bond. They come out really beautiful. Oh, and then the art part comes next. It's funny how much I love woodworking, I get such a kick out of that kind of stuff, which is also why I always find time to work here and there in my alternate etsy shop on some of those fun little houses and my newer wall pieces (which I will share next).

Flight No. Eleven
Pyrography, Pencil and Casein Paint

Flight No. Ten
Pyrography and Casein Paint

And some of my newer Parchment Prints. The pyrography work on parchment gives it such a warm antique-ey, vintage-ey feel. My parchment prints got a small gleaning moment of press a few months back when HGTV featured them on one of their contest pages. Designer Vanessa DeVargas spotted them on Etsy and chose them to be part of the contest winners package to freshen up her space. Here are a few..

There were quite a few originals in between and quite a few more parchment prints, if you would like to look further you can find them in my etsy shop TheHauntedHollowTree

And now onto the craftier end of things. I have been so busy with everything else, and in the debate between art and craft my love clearly lies with art, so I often find myself asking why I devote this kind of time to the miniatures. The thing is, I really have so much fun with them, in short bursts that is. They really are are a lot of work but they look so adorable hanging around on shelves and other tiny little places. And lately, I have had a few people interested in adding to their collections so that gave me enough of an excuse to get some sawdust flying this past week. I still don't have the answer for juggling both of these two shops, so I am just kinda winging it the moment.

And now onto what I like to call, "bridge-work", these pieces seem to fall somewhere in between. You can find both the mini's above and the wall pieces below here in my alternate etsy shop SaysTheTree

So that's all folks, for now. I am now off to help my husband wrangle the kiddies into bed, it sounds like the kiddies are currently winning. :)

I will be back with more soon!

i talk to myself ... but I get a lot done

2010-12-08T13:59:00.009-05:00

6 months? Really? I can't believe how fast time has gone by. My crazy one, Littlest, is going to be 2 years old next weekend. Good news is the the non-stop shrieking has well.... evolved. It's not quite as constant, but it is a tad bit louder. She is something else for sure. And my son, my son. 4 years old. What was it about terrible two's that is so bad? Two year old's have nothing on 4 year old's!

So I have about T-10 minutes to get this post in. I think I hear Littlest rustling upstairs so I am going to just get right into it. I have been slowly working myself back into art over the past couple of weeks. Kinda playing around with little woodworkings and then working on my larger woodburning/paintings/drawings. It's crazy trying to juggle everything. I honestly don't know how those with children more-than-the-count-of-2 have time to do anything self-serving at all, really I don't. I babysit a 16month old now 3 days a week. Maybe it's so tough because it's another persons child or maybe it's just tough because it's one more than two.

I am getting better with personal schedules which is helpful. Not quite up to the solid weekly schedules but getting great at writing a little list every morning of what's important and then making sure it (most of it) get's done. I also find that I am talking to myself a lot now which has been amusing. Mostly because no one is ever around to hear it. The past few Fridays my mom has been taking my kids for me so I can have the mornings for art. I pick them up around 1pm. After I do what I do, sometimes hands on art, sometimes photos, sometimes listings and always with all of the drama that comes with rushing. "Where did I put that pencil, I need THAT pencil" then walking in circles for 10 minutes trying to find THAT pencil. "Ahh, I found you!" Time to load photos. "Gah, my battery died. I know I charged you yesterday". You all know how it goes, right? Then the dreaded call that my mom has had enough of my little terrors. Finish up what I was just doing. Turn off computer. Grab car keys and walk out the front door. "Okay, art OFF, kids ON, no more art for today... let it go, let it goooooo". Kinda like once you get into the groove of something, it's hard not to keep thinking about it. Then I keep thinking about it and can't focus on the barrage of questions that my 4 year old fires from all cylinders...All. Day. Long.

Okay, she's screaming. Let me just share some of my new stuff...

I love this one. I don't usually say love about any of my stuff. Not because I don't usually love them (sometimes I do, and sometimes I just kinda am happy they ended up like something I tolerate after weeks of struggle) I guess I just don't think to say it. I think this time it's more because I enjoyed working on wood, but not woodburning which is the norm for me, so it was new and fun, not to mention fast and of course safe to actually work on around my kids. Hot burning metal + kids = not good. It's pencil, and casein on a cradled birch panel. 6x6. If you care to see more you can find it in my etsy shop (see left side of my blog). Notice how I don't take the time to post links like I used to. No time. No time! ;)

we were all led astray

And this little one, this is part of a new little project of super small pieces I am working on, all only 2" at their longest length. They all come with hangers on the back which allow them to hang without the hangers showing which is always bothersome to see, and they look awesome hanging in those little spaces between large clusters of wall art (I am a big fan of clustered wall art!) I have done quite a few more simple ones and listed them in my second etsy shop, but this portrait I have listed in my original shop. Two shops = confusing, I know. Someday I will figure it out.

Again, help yourself to my side bar if you want to learn more about them. And here are a few more photos..

Okay, GOTTA go. Also, I am having a sale in both of my etsy shops (again, side bar) 10% everything. Use code HOLIDAY at checkout. And for the record, I was so utterly opposed to the use of coupon codes, I swore I would never use them. Until, that is, I was going to offer 10% off my shops and realized I would have to edit each and every listing, not once, but twice. No time, no time! So use the code if you want 10% off anything that I have to offer. And you know what else. I am just plain old sick of seeing some of these pieces lying around, so if there is something you really want and it's been around for awhile, I would probably take even more off. Hooray for the end of the year sick-of-seeing-you-sitting-around-here.

Bye for now!

An awesome day!

2010-05-04T18:58:00.004-04:00

So I am beginning to figure this out! Today was an awesome day. I fit in art, and everything baby and house related, like I usually do, but today went MUCH better than usual. The secret was that I changed the order of operation. Usually I run myself ragged after I commit to a painting during some free time I am able to snag (usually nap time for one, and a little bit of TV time for the other), after the 'free' time is up and craziness ensues, I *usually* try to continue on painting for a little while (or a long while) as to not interfere with some happy momentum I had going. I stress out, rush things, lose concentration and freak out when the end of the day comes, I am sitting in a filthy house with neglected kids and a disaster of a painting. But today, today was different... Hurrah!!

I got up. Got everyone dressed and ready for their day. Packed a lunch, met a friend and took our kids to the park for some fun, fresh air and a picnic. Then came home, cleaned and prepared for dinner (preparing the food and the kitchen in advance was such a huge help!), THEN started painting. After the free time ended (which was shorter than I would have liked) I packed up my stuff and got my 3 year old prepped in the kitchen to help me cook up some vegetable stir-fry. We talked, he cleaned vegetables, Miss Missy watched her favorite movie and then we ate as a family (minus my husband). Then (and this is another critical thing) I cleaned up my entire kitchen in preparation for the morning, sippies and all breakfast goodies ready to go for the AM. Usually, after getting the kids ready for bed, I go right back to art and then at the very end of the night when I am exhausted, I have this big mess to clean up. Not fun. So we also fit in a lot of playing in between and some craft time too. The Matryoshka fabric I ordered for a project for my daughters room came today so we worked on that some too. All in all, what a great day it was!

I started another new painting today, yes, another. Lack of inspiration was never an issue for me. I get an idea and need to work on it immediately. That, in and of itself is half my problem I am sure. I did take some WIP photos and if I get a chance before it's complete, will post them. I vow from here on out to not start another new piece until I complete this one... and the one from my previous post. I have about 5 other half completed things from before that I am just not interested in fussing with so they will probably be held off indefinitely. The half finished painting from my previous post (Cathedral II) I am just totally in a weird place with and am seriously hesitant to even touch it. I have sat on it for too long now and have really grown to know it for what it is. When I left it, over a month ago, I was no where near completing it in my mind. It's really weird to reflect on a painting for so long without touching it. You go back to it, and formulate all kinds of new perspectives on where it should go, and then after even more time passes, you just kind of accept it and learn to love it for what it is. I might even just finish the pattern and leave the rest alone. We'll see I guess. I also have figured some other important things out, just things in general. Lot's of self-reflection has been going on lately.

That's it. Oh, and I asked for a disc/belt sander from my husband for Mother's Day. He informed me that I was crazy, that I was the only girl in the world (not likely though) asking for a power tool for Mother's day, and also dropped a hint that I probably would be getting it. Yay! I am always working on some type of woodworking project around here and it would come in handy for sure! Very soon I plant to build a small desk for my son's room and after that, a square play table and a couple of chairs for my daughter's room.

Okay, just got one child off to bed, and now want to spend some time with my son who is sitting by my side painting a lovely picture for his dad. Then after bedtime, it's back to painting for me.

Bye for now!

Work in Progress - Cathedral II

2010-04-26T17:50:00.037-04:00

I spent 5+ hours writing a massive blog post that started simple and morphed into this big long thing. Very much along the lines of my most recent posts. Me just trying to sort through some things. My words were bugging me though. I kept reading them and re-reading them and realized it was serving no good at all, and really lacked any noteworthy content besides a work-in-progress photo of my most recent painting. So here goes.

This is a painting I started over a month ago. It was right before I went on my quest to limit the amount of time that I spend on my art for my sanity's sake. I passed by it today and spent some time really thinking about a lot of things. I want to work on it again soon.

"Cathedral II" work in progress

I will be writing again shortly.

my course ... part I

2010-02-25T10:28:00.017-05:00

Disclaimer: What you are about to read is lengthy and most might find boring. It's broken in thought and might be disjointed at times. It will come in parts. I have made such a point to only write when I have a new painting or burning to share, in typical me fashion, not really divulging much of anything else. I just want to begin to share the process of what, why and how.... I want to share bits of my journey, and resources I have found along the way that have helped form who I am today when it comes to art.

***

As we know, I do not have a degree in art and have never been to art school. I started drawing when I was a young child and filled book after book with drawings. The earliest I can really remember taking it seriously (or what I thought to be serious at the time) I was probably around 8. I had a very large Disney book and I would draw every single character on every single page and this was a LARGE book. I ended up with a hundred or so drawings. I remember taking that Disney book and my drawing book everywhere with me. The first time I brought my books to my grandmothers house and showed her I remember how impressed she was. She asked me if I had traced them. I insisted I did not, and she didn't appear to believe me. That frustrated me and even at that young age, it motivated me. Lots of random drawing and observing ensued in the following years. Fast forward to age 19. I was living in my first apartment and after work I would come home and paint. I started with acrylic paintings because it was accessible and seemed easiest from the perspective of knowing nothing about anything about painting. My first painting was a large abstract style bonsai tree. I hung it proudly above my dining room table and thought it was fantastic. A friend of mine offered me $75 for it and I chose to keep the painting. Sadly I think it had gotten thrown out, along with almost every other early painting or drawing that I ever made. I would hit hard into a stint of frustration, where I hated everything I had ever done and became my own worst critic. This all sourced from my early studies of "real" art. I was on this mission (though at the time, I didn't view it like that, it was more of just interest) of absorbing and really understanding art. What makes for a successful piece? What aspects and what criteria does an artwork need to strike or fulfill for the piece to be effective? Why are the Masters the Masters? Why were all of these masterful pieces so different? What should one try to say in their work... is art creating a "pretty" piece, something someone would want above the dining room table, like a vase of flowers? Is art creating a subject that looks as realistic as a photo? Is art something that needs to be bold... does art need to be "contemporary"? Does all art need to be huge, or can there be beautiful little works in the small format? What constitutes success?

I spent many years reading books, reading about the masters to start. I would spend hours in the art aisle of bookstores trying to identify... browsing the different worlds of different artists, many unknown to me, and see if something would strike me and make me feel a certain way. I came across a large book called "Anatomy for the Artist" 142 full-page plates by Jeno Barcsay. Here is a link to it from Amazon Books What followed is what began and ended almost 10 years prior. I got a new empty drawing book and drew so many of the images that I found in the book. If a few weeks would go by and I would skim back through my pages and think that I could draw something better, I would. So the same image would show up numerous times, being improved upon each time, even if in just the slightest of ways. This book was amazing to me. I remember having the thought that I would learn about the human form from the inside out. That if you had a good working knowledge of what was happening on the inside with the skeletal system, muscles, tendons... that you would have a better understanding of movement and shape of the exterior. This was important to me.

At age 23 (seven years ago) I was living in my first house. I can't pinpoint the year when I really started to change, but if I had to go back, this would be the year. Growing up I was never really into the average stuff that kids were. Sure, I had friends but I never got close to anyone, especially girls. As I got older I had a little crew of guy friends who I remained close with because those relationships were easy for me. Guys never really got in your business and they were easy friendships to have. However, I had a really great life growing up and was very close with my family. When I was 23ish I hit a stage, and I can't even put it into words because I don't remember so great what I was feeling. I do remember wanting to be alone. I wasn't interested in chit-chat and I never felt like talking (traits that are still with me). I was not depressed, I was very happy actually, I just wanted to be alone. I went up to my loft after work and would paint. I disliked my job (I was an optician and lab tech cutting prescriptions into eye glass lenses) Though it wasn't so much the job itself that I didn't like, more the anger that I had to be there working when I wanted to be home painting and drawing. So I had the idea to put my first painting up on Ebay. It was a 24x30 acrylic of a woman (it was a self portrait of sorts, but I did not advertise that) I started it at $24. It sold for $78 and some change. I was surprised, happy and uncomfortable all at the same time. I couldn't believe that someone would want to hang something of mine on their wall. This was the beginning of mild success selling my art and what I look at now as a downward spiral. I started seeing art as money. That wasn't conducive to one finding their own voice and embracing art for what it really is. I turned to painting "pretty" pictures. I turned to painting cats. I turned to painting large abstract trees. I turned to painting large and *gulp* bright and COLORFUL contemporaries. They sold. I was positively reinforced and kept on along. Aware that I was making money, but still somewhere even in the smallest sliver, that I had no voice... that I wasn't really saying anything at all.

I hung around ebay for awhile and then stumbled into the world of ACEO's. These little (2.5" x 3.5") works of art selling for big bucks. I couldn't paint that small, because honestly, I wasn't a painter. I wasn't really anything. If I had to choose my best medium, it was pencil. It was what I was doing all along, and it came from a real place. So I started creating pencil drawing ACEO's. I did a series called "The Truth About Humans". One morning around 7am, I was next door babysitting, and while the kids were still sleeping I had my ipod on while drawing, a Govinda track came on and it was "Truth about Humans". I am not the best at describing the different music genres so I can't even begin to explain as to what style of music that Govinda is. It was from their O' Earthly Gods album which I am not seeing in their site (?). Love it though. You would have to hear it to understand. Very metaphysical. So that is where the name of the series came from. There were 20 total drawings in the series. They were of women who depicted various emotions. Resilience, Restraint... you get the picture. I also had a thing for depicting sad female figures. I never showed anyone my art besides my immediate family members, pretty much just my mom and my sister. My mom on numerous occasions questioned what I was doing. Why were the girls in my drawings so sad? She started out being proud of my art and I could see she was now embarrassed by this new found emotion and likely wouldn't be showing off my stuff (which I hated anyway) anymore at that point. You go through these times in your life when interactions happen with people who are important to you and if they are deep enough, and strike the right chord, they have the ability to stay with you forever. This was one of those things that has stayed with me. If there was an inkling of me willing to share my art with other people, that was now completely gone. I didn't want to explain myself. I didn't want to have to convince people that I wasn't sad and I didn't want people judging me. I already was a private person to begin with. I believe now that all of that depicted sadness was a way for me to explore the boundaries of being human, trying to find a way to strike a comfortable balance. I believe that through those years I have slowly begun to develop the ability to depict the presence of emotion, and to do so in a more graceful and less extravagant way.

Another moment that had a monumental impact on the growing sore spot was one evening I had come home from work and noticed that my husband (who was just my boyfriend at the time) had his friends over. When I got upstairs I heard that they were all in the loft. My loft. The place where I keep all of my art. My art that clearly leads people to judge me, to question me, and I barely even knew these people. I was shocked and sick over it. I don't remember how I handled it, I really don't. What I do know is that I presented all of my work as practice pieces, just little bits of trash that I was hanging on to and playing around with. One of his friends insisted that if the paintings were to go in the trash that he wanted one or two. I didn't know what to say. I let him take them and it messed with me everyday for a long time. I didn't like those paintings, it wasn't a lie. I didn't want them hanging on someones wall. I didn't want to know that for however long that those paintings were (or forbid, still are) displayed that they are associated with me. Dramatic? I don't know. I do know that I wanted them to stay in my loft. I do know that I wanted to have my own control over the things that I put out into the universe and that day I felt very out of control and pressured. These few things have had a big part in shaping who I am today. I have accounts on social sites, like facebook for example, where the people who know me in real life don't even know about my art. I make no mentions of it. I would rather that no one knows about what I do. Art is very personal and it just opens you up for dissection, I would rather leave that dissection to strangers.

While I feel valid in my interest of being private and my commitment to my journey of being the best I can be, I am disappointed in some of my behavior, the behavior that came along with the package of insecurity that I purchased at some point. I spent the better part of today digging through every space that I have and the three computers I own to find any visual image of the hundreds of paintings or drawings that I have created over these last few years. Gone (in my defense, the majority of images were on a computer that went down, lesson to all, back your files) They are strong in my memory though but I would have loved to share them here. I think it would be healing to share some of these images... I would show the ones that have embarrassed me, the bits of "trash" that I gave away or threw away, the pieces that I am proud of, the pieces that were turning points for me, the ones where I learned even a simple fundamental, all of these pieces were important. I know I am going to be creating art until the day I die, it is in me and I can't get rid of it (and I have tried too) so I will make right with this, I am beginning to realize the importance of embracing this process and save my work, if only for my kids to be able to look back.

With each child (now ages 3 and 1) I have decided to quit. I felt that I needed to focus 100% on them. I, for a long time, felt the guilt and failure that comes with the perceived notion of devoting too much time to my art and not enough time to my kids. Never really succeeding with the arts, and feeling like a failure to your kids is enough to send you on a wayward path. I can't get away though. Art makes me feel human and it makes me feel like me. My kids are loved more than any kids on this planet and are absolutely well cared for. I believe strongly that, of my family, I am the only person feeling the sting of juggling the two worlds and I choose to continue on this way. A very wise friend and artist who I have met while selling online has given me a very valuable perspective that I failed to see... I am teaching my kids the importance of determination and importance of working hard for something that you believe in. This bit of information means a lot to me and keeps me on course while juggling my love for my family, which is always my priority, with my love for my art and the importance of continuing on my journey.

more to come...

portrait I & sanctuary

2010-02-18T15:06:00.012-05:00

I am of few words today so I am going to make this quick. Two new smaller sized pieces are complete and available.

Portrait I
6" x 8"

Sanctuary
8" x 8"

untitled III

2010-01-28T10:52:00.015-05:00

Untitled III is a 16x20 mixed media figurative. I took a couple of work-in-progress photos and will share them as well. As I mentioned before, I am not as comfortable working in a larger format. I have been woodburning consistently for so many years now that seeing in the small format is what makes sense to me. It's a nice experience working larger and it's an even nicer experience getting back to figurative work.

I started this one like I do the rest, with a large wash of white casein. I use only casein paint, and only white. The rest is done in pencil and again with this piece, I added in the Japanese Kitakata paper.

The first time I used this paper was in the "How to Disappear Completely II" piece. I used it because I was having a hard time getting the level of interest I wanted with just the casein paint and graphite. Then that feeling cropped up again and I felt like the "Untitled II" piece would benefit since there was such a large expanse of empty space. Now I use it because I love it. It is so fun to work with and I love the effects you get after working through the different processes. I really enjoy the sculptural quality of it and also the effect that comes with peeling off layers. Like in that gray space over her shoulder to the right side.

I spent 15 working hours on this one, and made so many changes that one after another affected the next step. It was overwhelming to me because I found often that I would fall in love with a space and then I just couldn't make it work later on and had to take it away. Like in the 3rd WIP photo below. Her dark sleeve. I wanted to keep that sleeve. I really wanted to keep that sleeve. I kept trying to make the areas around it work and it wasn't happening. I wanted to keep it so bad that I took it away, brought it back, took it away, tried to bring it back, and then off it went again.

(these three WIP photos were taken within the first 3 hours)

Another really strong feeling that comes through in this process (as opposed to the structured Pyrography works) that I am definitely not used to, is when is enough enough? At what point did you satisfy whatever it is you are trying to satisfy? Did you say what you wanted to say? If I keep on going am I going to make one of those crucial changes that morphs everything I just did, and all of the parts that I love so much into something that I feel is now ineffective? That happened a lot, and I found myself getting gun shy towards the end. Just like with the previous few mixed media pieces I have done, I did eventually get to a point where I felt satisfied. I still had the urge to do more and maybe make some changes... it's just a strange environment. You look at something for so long, and so deeply, that you just don't "see" it anymore. You can't see it superficially, and I think you need to see it superficially at times.

The last big revelation I had was that I didn't devote enough time into the drawing process early on. I went right to pushing around the paint and adding in the paper to please the big picture aspect, and then somewhere in the middle couldn't figure out why I felt like it just wasn't working. When I realized that I didn't focus enough on the small details and that she wasn't defined like she should have been, I spent another hour or so on her, then when I went back to the big details it flowed much better.

I am not abstract. There is no part about my person that is abstract. My brain doesn't work like that and if it doesn't make sense and it's not something that I can look at and touch, I can't get it. There are some abstract aspects here, and that was a stretch for my instinct, but it was good. All of these things were good.

tree woodburning - work in progress

2009-12-31T13:39:00.009-05:00

{Update 1/28/10 - I have not gotten back to this piece yet. I have since started two other woodburnings (I know, I know) and numerous other paintings but I am sure I will come back around to this one someday}

Here is a new tree burning that I started a couple of weeks ago, only got about an hour into it then. I spent about 4 more hours on it last night. Like I have mentioned before, I have no great intentions of the end result when I start something new. I sanded up my wood (a beautiful piece of baltic birch that I wet sanded to a buttery soft surface) and then sketched out a tree, then started burning. I don't do preliminary sketches or anything like that anymore. I am a terrible with sketches because I always end up detailing them out and then when I go to start the actual piece it always looks totally different anyway.

5 hours later, I now have some ideas swirling around about what I want to happen with the underground area but that will probably change many times over by the end. One thing I always find exciting about working on my tree's is how they tend to "grow" themselves. I draw in one little split in the wood and that spirals into a whole web of roots and new details. I usually like to save the winding detail for the root area but I got a little ahead of myself last night and it just kind of took off in it's own direction. I find the artery effect in the trunk rather interesting though. After looking at it with fresh eyes this morning I really think that I need to keep some shell of the tree visible somewhere, but I think I may have already took off too much. The right side of the tree I can probably beef back up and give a heavier feel of exterior bark which would be nice.

It's a rather large woodburning for me, sizing in at 10" x 12". It is one of the larger ones I will be doing to date. With the amount of detail that I think is going to end up going into this one, it will probably take another month or so if I work strictly on this piece and not try to squeeze in some smaller paintings (which I probably will).

I will update here with new photos after each round of working so check on back to follow the course of this piece. Also, please don't let the coloring and contrast of my photos hold too much weight, photographing pyrography pieces and getting them to look even remotely accurate in coloring has always been a challenge for me so I won't be spending too much time on editing the WIP photos.

I won't be working tonight but hope to spend a few more hours tomorrow night so look for updates shortly. Have a safe and happy New Years Eve!!

untitled II

2009-12-09T15:50:00.014-05:00

Untitled II
16" x 20" Mixed Media
{SOLD}

I have turned some type of small corner with this piece. I had so many ups and downs I didn't know if I wanted to throw it out one minute or frame it as-is and put it on my mantle. I think the size had something to do with. I am so used to working in miniature sizes after all of these years that my brain couldn't adapt to seeing the composition properly at that size. I actually did most of this piece in the longest room of my house so I could work on it against one wall and walk all the way to the other side to shrink it down and see the big picture.

It is Untitled because like many of my other figurative pieces, I just don't have any real intentions with them. I find titling most of my work a daunting experience and I really am not interested in scrounging for a label anymore. Unless that absolute perfect title strikes me while working (which has happened a handful of times) I am not going to fight it any longer. So here we have Untitled II.

I had all intentions of this being a mixed media of casein and graphite only. After about 7 hours of pushing around paint to get a happy balance I found I was having a difficult time with the size and the large white expanse of her gown (started with all intentions of this being a seated dancer, but it has since taken on a life of it's own and I am happy to let it be viewed subjectively). I wanted to keep that large white expanse intact but couldn't make the break between the dark and the light transition nicely no matter how hard I tried. Reverting back to how nicely the kitakata paper worked into another recent piece I thought I would try it out and see what happened. The addition of the kitakata nudged me cleanly out of my artists block and things went lovely for the duration of the piece and I was thrilled with the process. As before, I was really happy with the sculptural effect the kitakata brings.

Another glitch happened early on. I almost always start a piece with the hands (which might change now considering the circumstances). I love working on hands, and it's usually the biggest challenge for me. I spent a good two hours working solely on her hands. I got them to where I wanted them and then moved on. Later into working I found that they were, once again, too distracting for the area in which they fell. It drew the eye down and that really wasn't what I wanted. So off with the hands. Sounds odd, but really, they were distracting.

Lastly, I had all intentions of creating a work in progress series of photos for this piece because I have had more questions on how this process works, even more so then with my woodburnings. So I got one photo deep and then never thought to grab my camera again. Here is the one lonely progress photo that I took and it was super super early on. Just a light sketch and the first layer of paint. Hopefully I can be better about documenting the process on my next piece.

This was a more difficult piece to photograph and am having a hard time capturing the detail and proper coloring. It's a very warm piece in person. Will work in new photos tomorrow.

found III

2009-12-05T12:44:00.005-05:00

Found: December 3, 2009
When I was young I used to hide in my closet. It was teeny tiny and if I could have made it smaller I would have. When I was a little older and we were at the pool, I used to jump in the water and stay down there for as long as I could, eyes closed and just listen to the stillness. The tiny bottle of black ink stirred up that familiar feeling. Dive right in and be away where no one can see you or know you, even for just a short time.

This is the first piece that I have added black into. I spent a really long time on the glass bottle and finally felt like there was enough contrast in my burns to accurately depict the hue and translucency of the bottle as well as it's contents. When I got to the ink puddle, that changed things. No matter how dark I burned I wasn't feeling there was enough of depth there. I started with a light black casein paint wash over the burn and still felt it was lacking. At that point, I took three steps to my left and picked up my ink bottle from my still life scene and dropped two drops of ink into the puddle. The perfect black ink color of course. Then I washed a little ink through the bottle for balance. The end.

(About the Series}
The subjects in this series will be little bits found in nature, things that I find with interesting patterns or textures, or any other thing I find which strikes me in a significant way.

This piece is available for purchase in my etsy shop.

found II

2009-11-24T09:33:00.009-05:00

The original of this piece has sold, but similar originals and parchment prints of this piece can be found here in my Etsy Shop

Found: November 22, 2009
This happens to me just about every year around this time. Walk out the door and find a suffering insect by your feet, an insect at the very end of it's life cycle. I can't just walk by and leave them like that. I am the type who catches every little thing in a cup or some shard of paper to let them free outside.

but I just can't let something suffer

{About the Series}
The subjects in this series will be little bits found in nature, things that I find with interesting patterns or textures, or any other thing I find which strikes me in a significant way.

You can learn more about the specifics of this piece here in my etsy shop.

how to disappear completely III

2009-11-18T15:48:00.008-05:00

For this series I had this subject in mind for a little bit now but I was hesitant to start it. I had/have major anxiety about being able to correctly portray this type of monumental connection. I spent a long time on each of their expressions, trying to hit it at just the right spot.

Something I am finding in working on these new pieces is that maximum detail is not always necessary. These past few I have actually removed detail that I spent quite awhile putting in. I found certain areas were distracting away from the sole story of the image. Learning balance.

I don't have many other details to share, I just hope I tapped into even the smallest amount of magic that exists when a mother looks into her newborn baby's eyes and disappears completely.

found I

2009-11-17T12:23:00.024-05:00

This is the start of a new series called "Found". The subjects in this series will be little bits found in nature, things that I find with interesting patterns or textures, or any other thing I find which strikes me in a significant way.

Found: November 16, 2009
Over the summer I was sitting outside with my son and he kept going over to our flower garden and picking individual flowers. Each one was given an identity of someone in our family. He was telling stories using the flowers as puppets for whom he felt like each one was. Just the other day I was outside cleaning up our yard in preparation for the winter and I found this one single dried flower displayed on one of the shelves inside his playhouse. While I do not remember exactly whom this particular flower represented at the time, I do know for sure that it was part of our family tree that summer afternoon.

Available for sale here in my etsy shop

how to disappear completely II

2009-11-10T12:35:00.010-05:00

This one is a little bit different for me. As previously mentioned and as probably observed, I am not big on color. I find it distracting. I am sure in the future I will add color to my work at some point, but when I do, it will be done very cautiously and with great intent.

In this one I was having difficulty getting the appropriate value into certain spaces. She has somewhere to be, and there are reasons for her going. I just couldn't get that impact with the few media that I have been using lately (graphite and white casein paint) so I pulled out this really delicate paper called Japanese Kitakata, and messed around with placement. I spent a few hours looking at it. (I do this thing where I place the piece far away from me, usually up high and on a shelf and then I go about my business and every time I come into the room I get a new feeling about it). So after doing this for a few hours, with the paper placed and then without, I decided that the paper just was right. It gave it some type of busyness that I wasn't able achieve without it. So on it went. I did some rubbing and sanding of it to smooth it out and take it down in certain spots. The layered Kitakata gives it a really unique sculptural texture. Two coats of varnish later and we are complete.

This piece was my entry for the Illustration Friday theme of Unbalanced.

how to disappear completly & untitled I

2009-10-27T19:04:00.010-04:00

"How to Disappear Completely"
{SOLD}

A few weeks ago I started a really detailed large tree woodburning (think Companions and Safe Keeping) but I put it down because the process just is endlessly long. I love woodburning, but I just need something else in my life. And I miss miss miss figuratives. Like I said in my previous post, the lack of freedom of fluid creativity has been bumming me out lately, and my little stint into printmaking has really urged me back into more expressive media like paint and drawing.

So by now it's probably no news to anyone that I have a love affair with all things monochromatic. In keeping with what I do I hit the art store and picked up some Ampersand Hardbord's and a set of gouache. Color, I know. And I just couldn't bring myself to splatter pigment onto my clean (and bland) hardbord. I like bland. I like minimalism, I like black, white and neutrals. I collect art as well, and mostly all of what I own is monochromatic, it just speaks to me and I find myself often getting distracted by color when I am looking at art.

The above piece is titled "How to Disappear Completely" and the below piece is an untitled figurative. Both can be found here in my etsy shop.

Untitled I
{SOLD}

facebook and a feature

2009-10-02T12:07:00.007-04:00

I rarely do the art thing on my facebook page because it is the one social network that I like to keep personal, so I have started a page specifically for updates and happenings that involve my art. If you are on facebook and want to stop by or follow me you can find the page here I will be updating it regularly.

In other news, I won the monthly art contest from Utrecht Art! I am their featured artist through the month of October and also won a gift card to spend on art supplies. Yay! Posted below are the two pieces I entered. I can't wait to get my gift card, I have my eye on a whole slew of new supplies.

"Cathedral"

"Companions"

first humble attempts at printmaking

2009-09-25T10:32:00.017-04:00

I have always been enamored with all forms of printmaking and have been a collector myself over the past few years. The beauty of a hand-pulled print with all of their little idiosyncrasies that make them so unique is something that I am really drawn to. Already being a woodworking artist, I was drawn first to the style of relief woodcut printing. I tried my hand at it with my first small piece titled "Forever". Not only is the cutting process a really enjoyable and expressive experience, the printing process is equally enthralling. After hand pulling a small edition of 10 prints I hopped online to look at at some of the other methods of printmaking. I discovered Monotypes and attempted my first piece, and wow, it brought me back to my painting days for sure with how fluid the creating process is. Monotypes are printmaking in it's most bare bones form, you get once chance... one print and then you are done. No edition's can follow (you actually can pull one or maybe even two "ghost" prints and use them as the basis for a new piece, but the ghost prints come up extremely faint and give only a mere suggestion of what the original print really is).

There seem to be no rules when it comes to how you apply your ink and work out your image. I used the reductive method where the surface of the plate is completely inked and then the image is wiped from the dark field. Once you feel that the piece is where you would like it to be, you can pull your print from the glass plate. It's really bizarre trying to manipulate this thick ink in a way that you *think* might pull up nicely. I found that certain areas that I carefully blended down thinking that it would give me a grayish value never even showed up at all. It's going to be quite a process learning what levels of ink are necessary and how to maneuver them to achieve the look you desire.

Many artists then go in and work on the piece using other media, what came the most naturally to me was pencil. So then I went ahead and used a graphite pencil and sketched over top of the print to create the final piece. The glass plate is wiped clean and the final print is now a unique piece in an edition of only 1.

This was really an unusual experience for me and as with anything else there are tons of little things to learn that will come with time. On "Grieve" I originally wanted to leave a bare spot in the left side of her chest. Not being familiar with the process I neglected to realize at the time that the image will be printing in reverse. So the "hole" in her chest that was supposed to be where her heart was ended up printing as if it were on the right side of her chest. I giggled when I realized this. You take for granite sometimes the luxury of having an in-depth knowledge of your medium of choice. Thinking back, I remember clearly the challenges I faced with Pyrography and how much I really have learned along the way. I also learned many things from my first woodcutting experience in "Forever". One being that certain knife blades cut better in specific directions. So trying to cut against the grain with a gouge caused jagged edges where the v-tool cuts much cleaner going in that direction.

After working on these early pieces I found myself doing what I usually do and became critical of the end results. I started to wonder what I should even put out there and what I should keep here at home away from view, thinking that maybe after I got "better" at these processes that I would then put them out there for the world to see. After giving it thought, I decided the best thing to do is embrace the process. The process of learning a new medium and growing as an artist without insecurity (yeah we'll see how that works out for me). It's just so different. Pyrography at its core is a very structured medium, one that requires focus, precision and a relatively long-term commitment to the piece. This new found liberty to work in such a fluid manner has opened up a door that has been closed for quite sometime. These few experiments really were fun for me and I am thrilled to have finally tried my hand at printmaking and look forward to discovering new techniques.

tree work in progress

2009-09-10T16:03:00.014-04:00

Here is the new piece I started for the Illo Friday theme of "Strong". Solid roots and companionship both make us strong.

Both images here are crops, the complete size will be 9" x 12". Woodburning on Italian Poplar. 7 hours into it so far. Hopefully I will have it complete by the end of next week. You can click on the photo to see them in more detail. As you can see the pieces are quite messy while I am working on them. My tree's are sketched as I go so there are quite a few pencil marks about that will get cleaned up closer towards the end. I actually did a fair amount of cleaning up before I photographed. The burning pen leaves indentations in the wood that you can also see. The only way to clean this up is to relentlessly go over the image time and time again with my burning pen, that will clean up the marks and give a seamless look. Did I say 20 hours? I am now thinking it might clock in way above that due to the size. We'll see.

I really wanted to get a WIP video of this one but I haven't been able to get the camera set up and get time away from the kids to make it happen. Here is a video from earlier this year of me working on a similar piece.

first to fall

2009-09-08T14:11:00.007-04:00

This is the piece that I started for the Illustration Friday theme "Wrapped". I was walking around the yard with my toddler who was collecting leaves, when we got home we laid them all out on the table and only one leaf of the collection had already wrapped itself up in preparation for the fall.

This piece is available for sale in my etsy shop. You can find the listing here

illustration friday - wrapped

2009-08-20T18:22:00.015-04:00

First order of business is Illustration Friday. I started a couple of days ago for the theme "Wrapped" and I just couldn't get it complete by the end of today (the deadline to post on the Illo. Friday site). What can you really do, you know. I plan on having the piece complete over the next few days and will blog about when it's done. So for the theme of "wrapped" I am going to submit a throwback piece. I think "Safe Keeping" fits the bill.. a mama tree wrapping up her little baby tree, protecting him from the world so he can securely grow up big and strong. Anyone who knows me IRL knows that this piece is near and dear to my heart. The original is displayed in my home and will remain here since it is a gift to my two babies, but I do sell a reproduction of it in my shop. If you are so inclined to take a peek, you can find the listing here

"Sake Keeping"

who didn't know ...

2009-08-18T08:15:00.005-04:00

that I couldn't stay away?? I did, I did! So it has been no great surprise but I have been staying up to all hours of the night to get some woodburning in and, shame on me, I have also been sneaking it in here and there during the day. I just can't stay away! I have never been known for my multi-tasking abilities but I *think* I have gotten better at managing the time spent between my children, my house and my work . I hope that I have at least. I might be run ragged (and look run ragged) but I am happy because I am making time for everything that I love!

So back to art. I have a few new pieces in the works and am really excited. I am working on a couple of still life pieces which is something that I always wanted to try and I have a few other ideas swirling around my sleepy head. I hope to have a piece that should be complete tonight, listed in my shop by the end of the week.

My 8 month old is shrieking from the other room and I think my toddler toilet papered my living room. Must go now.

hiatus

2009-05-20T23:07:00.005-04:00

I am taking a little bit of an art hiatus. I have been basically doing my art as a full time job for the past 5 years now and that was all fine and good before I had children. The other day I had a very big revelation. My son is two and half and my daughter is now 5 months old. I seriously feel like I blinked and my son went from being a newborn to a full blown toddler and I don't even remember much of the in between. We have spent shameless hours indoors watching tv while I scrambled through all of my daily online activites (emails, promotion, photo editing, general shop updating) and then I would spend every nap time and every evening doing the actual woodburning, and then I would squeeze in some cooking and cleaning somewhere in between. It just was stressful for everyone and just not worth it. It's totally my fault, I am an all or nothing kind of girl and have never been good at making art anything but a full-time gig, and I have never been great at juggling either. I just don't want to wake up one day and regret letting these years slip by, and I would and already am. So here are my plans... I am going to spend a good few months with the babies and take the time to get my house and my life organized again, do some gardening (this is my first year attempting a serious vegetable garden), learn to bake homemade bread (which I have been really wanting to do) and just have some fun with the family and enjoy life.

Other exciting news is that my parents just bought a house one minute away, just around the corner, and my sister put an offer in on a house only about 5 minutes away. This is big for me, for us. We moved out here 2 years ago and have been quite lonely ever since. No family or friends, no one to hang with and no help with the kids. Now we have grandparents, aunts, uncles, sisters, brothers, cousins and friends right out here with us ~ and I would be lying if I didn't say that I am happy to have sitters now :). My mom is going to take the kids for a few hours a couple of days a week so that I can get back to my art. I can't even imagine what it will be like to have few solid hours of peace and quiet to work, this is very exciting for me! Gone are the pre-children days when I would wake up nice and early, put on some nice music, sip some wine and create art until late in the night. Sigh. These few hours of uninterrupted time will be the closest I get to that anytime soon. Hey, I'll take what I can get!

So that's the update for now. I am still alive and well and all is wonderful!

2009-03-28T14:34:00.001-04:00

This post is going to be quick because both of my children are raising it right now. *Finally* here is the finished piece for the Illo. Friday theme of "Intricate". I can't get a clear photo of this to save my life, it really is quite fuzzy which makes some of the detail hard to see. You know, my thoughts on this one are that people may prefer the "halfway finished" version of it (I must admit, I do). That has happened before on the few occasions where I take work in progress photos.

It ended up a bit darker then I had planned, I had initially put so much dark in around the knot area to accentuate the depth factor which kind of led me to darken up everything else around it. Another classic case of death by over-working. Oh well, this is how you learn and grow right? I think it's kind of neat though to see how a few extra layers of burn to the background can make an area that previously looked so dark, turn into a lighter area (see the middle finger of the left hand).

So this one is a 6x6 on a cradled wood panel, and is entirely woodburned with no other media applied.

On to other news. I am doing a show in downtown Lancaster during the month of April. I have been really hustling to get everything together on relatively short notice. Once I get all of my work there and on the walls, I am going to spend a week or so working on my vegetable garden, and then I will be working on some new woodburnings again. I have a few other new burnings complete but I will have to post pictures later. And of course I will post pictures of the show in a week or so too.

illustration friday - intricate

2009-03-12T15:11:00.012-04:00

Okay, so here is the piece that I am working on for the Illo Friday theme of Intricate. It is taking me so much longer then I had expected this to take. I am only about half way done. I wanted to have it done by this afternoon, but no such luck. Life kind of got in the way this week. I am going to see if I can clock some late night hours this evening, and I figure in about 4 more hours or so, I could have it done. *sigh*. When Friday rolls around and the new theme gets posted, people seem to have their pieces done with lightening fast speed! I always seem to spend a day or so really thinking about how I want to approach the theme... zzz...and then coming up with a composition...zzzz... then sketching it out... zzz... then finally starting the burning by Monday if I am lucky. Hah! Well what can I say, I take this stuff seriously.

In all seriousness, it was funny how I came up with this idea. I was thinking of doing a really tricked out tree, pretty much just the base of the tree would be in view, and then these really deep, detailed roots. Then my son came over with a big wad of thin string that he had so carefully strung all around my room (I mean ALL around my room) and he teetered over to me and plopped the wad of string right down on my wood block. And so... the idea was born. After I (err, we) got the idea I spent about 2 hours trying to take photos of my own hands "working" on this wad of string. While my toddler did what toddlers do best, and tried with all of his might to sabotage my photo shoot. Ah well.

Anyway, I think this one is coming out pretty neat so far. Try to have an open mind when looking at what I currently have going on, it's really only about halfway done and the photo isn't the best. I will update later with the finished pics.

illustration friday - breezy

2009-03-04T19:02:00.010-05:00

I discovered "Illustration Friday" last week and got tangled up with it immediately upon discovering this weeks theme of "Breezy", how could I not participate??

This one took longer then I thought it would. If you look at my previous blog entry you will see a work in progress video of me woodburning this one. The clip starts about an hour into the burning process. I mentioned that it would be another 4 hours or so of burning, but I spent about 6 more hours on it. I spent a great deal of time on the under-burning of the sky... the breezy-ness of it kinda got ahead of me.

So here are the details...

6" x 6" x 1 and 5/8" deep cradled wood panel. The entire artwork was woodburned, and then I put a light layer of casein paint in the sky area for that breezy pale blue effect.

You can find it in my etsy shop here

work in progress video

2009-03-02T18:08:00.011-05:00

I have been wanting to do this for some time now. The quality is pretty low, I think because I had a strong back light from the window behind me and because I could have zoomed in a little bit more. Hopefully this is enough for people to get an idea of how I do what I do. I will definitely have more detailed videos to post in the near future.

The video is 6 minutes long (a little over 12 minutes of actual burn time shown in 2x speed). It's of a new tree burning that I am doing for my first Illustration Friday piece under the theme "breezy". The start of the video is after roughly an hour or so of burning. I will have another 4 or so hours of burning until it is complete. I will post pictures as soon as it is done, probably in a day or so.

haunteds

2009-02-27T13:04:00.027-05:00

This is a piece that I did in 2007. Entirely a pyrography piece with just a hint of white oil paint. This was a fun little series to do.

and here are Haunted I and Haunted II, both sold in 2007.

cathedral

2009-02-06T20:25:00.004-05:00

Ahh, this one was really neat to do. I haven't done a portrait style piece in so long. They really are personal and I find that they can be really difficult to pull off without looking hokey. I usually only take the chance when I come up with a sketch and a composition that I really think will work. This one was inspired by those old classical portraits. I wanted to do a little something more striking through her body area since it was to be such a large portion of the space. I found this really neat image of a moroccan tile floor, so I referenced that. It was also one of the first few times in all of my woodburning years (about 5 years now) that I have had a really large block of burning time that was pretty mindless. Usually, since woodburning is permanent and allows no room for mistakes, I have to really focus on what I got going on. The tiled area really was this kind of just simple mindless burning. I really thought about lots of neat things. I mean, I really got to take notice to the fact that I rarely get to be alone with my thoughts much anymore. I can't really do much burning around the kids, for obvious reasons, so I can only burn in those small window of my day, when the planets align just right and both of my children are napping. Well, I don't know where I am going with this at this point, it was just a nice and peaceful few hours.

You can see more images and visit my shop listing here

companions

2009-02-06T20:14:00.005-05:00

This was my first burning of the new year.

I usually have all of these deep thoughts and bits of information that I want to share about each of my pieces when I go to list them. All of those thoughts seem to dissipate very quickly though due to the constant chaos in my home (think hyper toddler, fussy newborn and major lack of sleep).

So I have nothing exciting to share about this one at the moment, other then the fact that I really like burning trees. Profound, I know.

You can find more pictures here

untitled figurative

2009-02-06T19:57:00.007-05:00

Here we go, I finally found the time to get some of my new pieces listed. I just am so in love with these cradled wood panels!

This one really started out as a mini study on hands. When I first look at a figurative piece, I am usually drawn to the hands at first glance. I am not sure why that is, but I just think that they are so expressive. Gustave Klimt is a great example of an artist who creates really intriguing hands on his figures. I can't say that I really have a favorite artist, but I do really enjoy his work, so he is up there on my list.

This piece is a 6" x 6" x 1.5" deep cradled wood panel. It is a woodburning (of course) with accents of casein paint.

You can see more photos of this work here

the visitor II

2008-11-26T16:36:00.009-05:00

This is the first ACEO I have done in quite sometime. It is a woodburning/graphite done on hardwood Maple. You can find the listing in my Etsy shop here

waiting

2008-09-17T13:35:00.005-04:00

This is one of my largest woodburnings to date. Like I mentioned before, every size you go up, tacks on hours and hours of added burn time, so I usually tend to stick with some smaller sizes. What is a bummer is that the photo's just do not do woodburning justice, I guess it's that way for most art pieces though. The texture and the detail is so hard to capture in pictures.

It's interesting because I don't have a size in mind when I start these pieces. I don't tend to have many concrete details at all before I start. I just kind of come up with an idea that I want to work around and then start sketching. I sketch directly onto a large piece of baltic birch, usually closer to the center of the wood. After I get the general feel and shape of the figure down, I work in some basic ideas of the layout. After I have the basic idea, I then figure out what size best compliments the overall composition. I rule it out so I can keep an eye on the general working space. Somewhere about halfway through, I scroll saw out the final size. The reason I wait until about half way through is that sometimes my idea for the direction I want the piece to go in changes, thus changing the shape and the composition.

Most of the small details come along towards the end. I usually start with the figure and go from there. Since I am working in a permanent medium, and mistakes cannot be corrected I spend a lot of time just looking at it for awhile trying to figure out my next move. I generally work through the whole piece that way, I figure out what the best next move is and then go from there... once that area is done, I figure out the next best move and so on. By move I mean, what values a certain area should have, for example, should a certain hill be a dark burn, or possibly a light white paint.

My favorite part of most of the pieces are the blowing leaves. I just love discovering what the best path the flowing leaves should take.

This piece took me about approx. 10 hours from start to finish. A lot of the time spent on thickening up the darker areas, like the sky and the details in the bench. The style of burning I do (since the tip is so small... only the size of a ball point pen) each dark area requires lots of light layers. It is not a matter of simply pumping up the heat and burning, it would never have that smooth transition if I did it that way.

I will be listing this in my shop over the next couple of days, maybe later today if I can get the photo's I need. I will hopefully add a few more detailed photos here as well.

seeking the night

2008-09-11T13:02:00.004-04:00

So here is my newest. Like most of the others, it is Pyrography and Casein paint on Baltic Birch. I think this one single handedly aided in the early onset of arthritis in my right hand. Maybe its because I did most of this in one sitting, or maybe its because I use the most monotonous form of shading that I could possibly use. The thing is, is that all of my burnings are done with one small writing tip pen (see this post for a photo of the pen http://thehauntedhollowtree.blogspot.com/2008/08/guarding-night.html
When in reality there are actually burning pens/tips specifically meant for shading. I just don't like the way they shade, they don't offer the smooth graduation that my way does.

When I started pyrography about 5 years ago, I never researched or learned about the proper ways of doing things. This likely comes from having never gone to art school to learn that there are *actually* proper ways of doing things. I just jumped right into every different medium that I have tried over the years and figured out ways of doing things for myself. That likely made my road a little more frustrating for sure, but I think some good has come from that too. When I found pyrography, I was very into graphite drawing, so I picked up a writing tipped burning pen and treated it as much like a pencil drawing as I could. Sure, woodburning has its difficulties that pencil drawing does not have, but I just adapted it over the best that I could.

So thats it for now. If you want to learn more about this artwork, I will have more photos and information on it when I list it in my etsy shop later today.

for now

2008-09-09T12:11:00.001-04:00

So the rain let up and a peek of brightness came through for a few minutes and I was able to take a few photos of this one. I really should wait until tomorrow to photograph this one because the pictures will come out sharper, I dunno though. I have a little girl on the way (this will be our second child), and I really want to keep this one for her. I rarely have a deep desire to keep something that I have done, so this is usually not a feeling that I have to deal with often. I wish I would hit the lottery and then it never would be an issue at all, but don't we all wish that.

We moved out to the country last year and I can't believe how damn cold it is out here. Our home is heated by oil... I guess I don't need to go further with the issue of this. We are saving all of our spare money to buy a nice big pellet stove for our fireplace and try to rely mostly on that for our heating this winter. The baby is due this December, and since keeping her and my toddler warm are my priority, I will likely be selling this one to put the funds into my pellet stove savings envelope.

These damn hormones...